Demons, we all have them, and we all have to face them.  Mine however always show up at the most inconvenient of times.  In this tumultuous relationship that Ivana and I share, one that has lasted about 82 days to date, there has been enough scandal and drama to fill a relationship that is pushing 20 years and although this can make for an excellent story book it does not make for a healthy relationship.  Interestingly enough the root of these scandals can be traced back to one person in the relationship, Ivana.  Countless mishap after mishap I am no stranger to the sigh and the heavy head.  I have a head so heavy that sometimes it is too heavy to lift up.  I find it hard to keep my head up when my mind is filled with the shrouded ambiguity of the past, the endless negative possibilities of the past.  Today I hear a rumour that in the past she has vehemently denied, however what makes this rumour that much more intriguing and believable is that it is from a trusting and very verifiable source.  What makes it worse is her constant knack for lying to me.  Tomorrow will very much be a moment of truth for her.  I can very much attribute my pain and suffering to he who will not be named, but it is clear that choice is the game breaker here.  It is what seperates this from a damsel in distress, bad guy routine.  On that note I will sleep with a heavy heart and a restless mind with one thing to leave the world with.  Choice is so powerful, it is what can make you powerful in the future, but by virtue of that, the choices we make can also break you later and be the downfall of everything you may want, and more unfortunately destroy the happiness of others.  So now currently in the midst of this tender young 82 day relationship I will sleep and contemplate the thoughts in my head knowing that this relationship may not last an 83rd day.

The world has so many inequities.  Some people are slapped with undeserving debt and are little worker bees (like myself) and some people barely lift a finger and have enough money to to buy Ethiopia.  Some people that are dead should still be walking this earth and some that don't deserve to even have been born end up controlling the world.  It seems like all the people suffering can do is sing songs of their dismay and the people partaking in gluttony, they only get richer.  Today I just want to appreciate everything and everyone I have in this world, and all the things I don't.  Always love the True Gods.  I love you always and forever Ivana.  Always love Los Perdomos.